{"id":79254,"date":"2018-06-04T02:22:13","date_gmt":"2018-06-04T09:22:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/lifeboat.com\/blog\/2018\/06\/study-finds-the-limits-of-putting-oneself-in-anothers-shoes-instead-ask-and-listen"},"modified":"2018-06-04T02:22:13","modified_gmt":"2018-06-04T09:22:13","slug":"study-finds-the-limits-of-putting-oneself-in-anothers-shoes-instead-ask-and-listen","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lifeboat.com\/blog\/2018\/06\/study-finds-the-limits-of-putting-oneself-in-anothers-shoes-instead-ask-and-listen","title":{"rendered":"Study finds the limits of putting oneself in another\u2019s shoes (instead, ask and listen)"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a class=\"aligncenter blog-photo\" href=\"https:\/\/lifeboat.com\/blog.images\/study-finds-the-limits-of-putting-oneself-in-anothers-shoes-instead-ask-and-listen.jpg\"><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Important \u2014 \u201cUnderstanding the mind of another person is therefore enabled by getting perspective, not simply taking perspective.\u201d<\/p>\n<hr>\n<p>I still remem\u00adber the time I tried to com\u00adfort one of my best friends when her father died. Because I\u2019d lost my own par\u00adents years before, I thought I under\u00adstood her pain. But, when I offered sym\u00adpa\u00adthy, she balked. Her father\u2019s death had been tran\u00adscen\u00addent, filled with love and fam\u00adi\u00adly con\u00adnec\u00adtion. She didn\u2019t feel pain; she felt at peace.<\/p>\n<p>Try\u00ading to see where anoth\u00ader per\u00adson is com\u00ading from is often tout\u00aded as a key to empa\u00adthy. If we imag\u00adine our\u00adselves in their shoes, the think\u00ading goes, we\u2019ll be able to pre\u00addict their feel\u00adings and their behav\u00adior, bridg\u00ading the gap between self and oth\u00ader. This is con\u00adsid\u00adered a skill\u2014sometimes called \u201cthe\u00ado\u00adry of mind\u201d\u2014that begins in child\u00adhood and devel\u00adops through\u00adout our lives, help\u00ading us to nav\u00adi\u00adgate social sit\u00adu\u00ada\u00adtions gracefully.<\/p>\n<p>But <strong>a new\u00adly pub\u00adlished study (see below) sug\u00adgests that try\u00ading to take anoth\u00ader per\u00adspec\u00adtive may be less ben\u00ade\u00adfi\u00adcial than we think\u2014at least when it comes to tru\u00adly under\u00adstand\u00ading anoth\u00ader per\u00adson. The alter\u00adna\u00adtive? Direct ques\u00adtions and answers. If peo\u00adple can\u2019t read each other\u2019s minds, then we need to use our words.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><!-- Link: <a href=\"https:\/\/sharpbrains.com\/blog\/2018\/06\/04\/study-finds-the-limits-of-putting-oneself-in-anothers-shoes-instead-ask-and-listen\/\">https:\/\/sharpbrains.com\/blog\/2018\/06\/04\/study-finds-the-limi...nd-listen\/<\/a> --><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Important \u2014 \u201cUnderstanding the mind of another person is therefore enabled by getting perspective, not simply taking perspective.\u201d I still remem\u00adber the time I tried to com\u00adfort one of my best friends when her father died. Because I\u2019d lost my own par\u00adents years before, I thought I under\u00adstood her pain. But, when I offered sympathy, [\u2026]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":469,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[20],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-79254","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-futurism"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lifeboat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/79254","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lifeboat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lifeboat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lifeboat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/469"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lifeboat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=79254"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/lifeboat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/79254\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lifeboat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=79254"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lifeboat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=79254"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lifeboat.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=79254"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}